i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
she told me i tasted like america
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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