Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
