I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
