i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
