How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
