apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
