I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I think I just sharted jello shots
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
