I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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