But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
