i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
