She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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