I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
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