Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
