He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
