i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
