i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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