i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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