Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
