and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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