It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Randomize
