You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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