she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
There's always time for handjobs
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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