ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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