I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Oh god it's open bar.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
