Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
