Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
