Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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