Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
