Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
