is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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