how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
