I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
We just shotgunned beers for America
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
