READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
what the fuck happened to the tacos
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
