hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize