My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
