I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
