ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
