Those balls look pretty dangerous.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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