The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
