If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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