Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
high people should be assigned attendants
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize