Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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