In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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