bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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