So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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