on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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