dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
