I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
