Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
