Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
